How do I tell my mom?

Dec 5, 2012

Kaitlin K.

Okay, so I have a problem. I asked my mom what she wants for Christmas, and she said she wants a good anti-aging wrinkle cream. The thing is, I don't want to get her one, nor do I want her to spend the money on it herself. Why? Because I know it will do no good. She tans a lot, and her skin is really damaged because of it. I know there's no miracle cream that can fix it. My mom is the kind of person who gets mad and offended easily, so I don't know how to tell her. But at the same time I want her to know what she's doing to her skin, and the dangers of it! Please help!

Dec 5, 2012

Vicky P.

Just get her a cheap one maybe Avon 

Dec 5, 2012

Kaitlin K.

But I do want her to know what she's doing to her skin by tanning all the time.

Dec 5, 2012

Nadine S.

So the thing I always learned in my life nobody likes to hear what they don't want to hear. We like to only hear what we want listen. So I think maybe you can get her a consulting package instead and say that I think you can try something new. I also think you might want to be straightforward and tell her that she had damaged her skin and you don't want her to face skin problems. Don't be shy I think she will understand. I used to be the same thought my parents will be offended etc but am just straightforward but reality is reality. 

Dec 5, 2012

Nora W.

I used to tan all the time, despite knowing it would give me wrinkles later on. One of the products that helped me break this habit was Olay "total effects touch of sun". Olay "total effects" is an anti wrinkle treatment that claims to be as good as really expensive wrinkle creams, and the "touch of sun" version has a little self tanner in it. Its not a crazy fake tanner, so you dont have to be careful about messing up. In my experience this was a great way to feel like I was using a cream to help fight aging, and gives a nice tan look to your skin that will gradually increase the more you use it. It is only about $20-$30 depending on where you buy it. I think that for people who are addicted to looking tan this product might help them transition. It is really hard to convince someone to quit tanning. I still struggle with avoiding tanning, esp in the winter. I agree with the other that you should tell her how you feel. Maybe you can give her this for Christmas and include a card that explains that you bought this in hopes that it might help her stop her dangerous behavior. Sometimes it's easier to say things you know someone doesn't want to hear, or may hurt their feelings in a letter rather than a conversation. This way you will be able to really think about what you want to say and choose your words carefully (also you get a chance to say everything you want without being interrupted by the person defending themselves). If you do this I would try to make the note heartfelt and say things like how you hope she gives up the habit because dont want to loose her to something like skin cancer, rather than telling her you think its a lost cause to try and reverse the damage with creams. Sorry this is so long, I just really identify with your situation and hope I can help in some way. Good luck