Help How Do I Help Her.

Mar 13, 2015

Bea S.

I really need advice, URGENTLY. I have this friend who wears dark "glamorous " makeup and clothes as much as she can and is a bit of a "wannabe" goth. I have no problem with this, it's completely up to her what she wears and how she looks, but her makeup is really, really, INCREDIBLY, bad. Her foundation is too dark, thick, patchy, and it sticks to every spot and mark on her face aswell as being covered in lines. She uses between six and ten squirts daily (no joke she actually does this) and applies it all at once because she thinks it covers her spots, but really it emphasises them and makes her look so much worse. Her eyeliner is thick and black, which would look good, but she cannot apply it properly. It's wobbly and thicker along the bottom than the top, harsh, extremely different on both eyes, and never blended to look right. She brings her eyeshadow right up to her eyebrows even if it's black. She misses half her lips when applying lipstick and draws well over the other half without meaning to, so it looks like a child's colouring in.
I could go on but I feel really mean. I know this isn't a nice thing to say about your best friend, but I don't know what else to do, and if I'm asking for your help, you probably want to understand how bad the situation is. I've tried to help her. I've dropped hints, I've given her a makeup masterclass (with the excuse that I wanted to be a makeup artist and practice my teaching abilities), I bought her a heap of makeup at Christmas which all had guides on the packaging, and I've even outright told her like "you've missed your Cupid's bow with your lipstick", but it's not working. If anything, it's getting worse. I know people talk about it behind her back because people speak to me about it all the time or mock her behind her back, but I'm at a loss for what to do now. Please someone help, I'm completely out of ideas and I really can't let her go on like this anymore. Thank you all so much for reading this far haha

Mar 13, 2015

Charlotte B.

Why don't you say let's do each others make up? Do her make up a way that you know she'll like it but do it better? Use less foundation on her and if she loves it surely she want to copy what you've done hopefully! And then you can show her how you've don't it or let her do your makeup and when she's finished say you've put way too much foundation on me and it's all messy and what not then she might think wow that looks bad if she can see it on someone else? Just an idea. I hope you get on ok and to the people that are nasty behind her back just tell them to go and say it to her face or not say it at all. If that's how she wants to look then hey what can you do :)

Mar 13, 2015

Emma A.

Tbh she probably doesn't care. Someone who does asks for help and she's not. She's happy with what she's doing.
Maybe just outright say it doesn't look good. Honesty is best policy

Mar 13, 2015

Bea S.

I'll pass this idea on to my friend who is trying to help her with me. It's a good idea, definitely worth a shot! And yeah, the problem is that I think she thinks it looks different to how it actually looks (if you know what I mean). I will pass this on, thank you Charlotte!

Mar 13, 2015

Bailee H.

I tell my friend her makeup looks like shit when it does, if you can't count on your best friend to tell you, who can you count on? I would totally want someone to tell me if I looked bad. I would probably approach the situation by asking her if she likes the way it looks though, because that's going to be what is most important.

Mar 13, 2015

Bea S.

Emma, it's not that she doesn't care, she just genuinely doesn't seem to see how bad it is. Your right, honesty is best, maybe we should just tell her...
Bailee, that is a very good point. We should tell her. We can't get through to her any other way maybe it's time to just say it to her how it is. Afterall, if she loves us she will appreciate it. So how do we tell her? 😂

Mar 13, 2015

Les N.

Tell her straight up

Mar 13, 2015

Sanai S.

Honestly, just sit her down and tell her her makeup does not look good and then show her how it could be fixed, you could show her YouTube videos.

Mar 13, 2015

Lara C.

Its a tough situation... Honesty is the best thing and offer to help if anything. But just saying it is the hardest part! Itll take courage and you know what... It may be upsetting to her. but in the long run shell be thankful

Mar 13, 2015

Mallory L.

My BFF is a pro makeup artist and when I met her I was just starting to learn about makeup and when we finally became BFFs she flat out told me one day "girl I know you're still learning makeup but you look crazy. The way you apply your makeup actually takes away from your beauty, rather than enhancing it." Then she proceeded to show me the difference between how I apply certain things vs other ways to apply it and the difference it makes in the end results. If she's really your bff you shouldn't have to sugar coat things, ya know. I'm definitely not saying you should intentionally say hurtful things but you should be able to be honest with her.

If you don't want to take that approach, I recently saw some YouTube videos where makeup artists/enthusiasts do one half of their makeup the "bad" way and the other half the "good" way so you can see a side by side comparison. You can find these YouTube vids and send me to her because it sounds like she makes the same "mistakes" that these artists make when the do the "bad half" of their makeup

Mar 13, 2015

Bea S.

Omg thank you all so much!! Les, your right I will. Sanai, good thinking, we will sit her down (my other friend and I) and just gently tell her how it is. Lara, I really hope so, I hope she can see the good side to it. Mallory, that's brilliant thank you, I now know what to say, what to do, and videos to show her! Thank you all so much, I knew we did the right thing turning to all you ladies for help. I honestly really appreciate this, thank you all from the whole of my heart.

Mar 13, 2015

Bea S.

That's a brilliant idea Alex, but we don't have sephora in the uk sadly. Would Mac or boots do the same thing?

Mar 13, 2015

Yaya B.

Can you post a pic of her like that? lol just kidding... seriously though I agree with just telling her it looks flat out bad and show her how to fix it...she will thank you for it.

Mar 13, 2015

Alma M.

How old is she?

Mar 13, 2015

Bea S.

Yaya haha gosh she's hate me for that haha! I will, my other friend and I are planning how to tell her right now :) Alma, she recently turned 16.

Mar 13, 2015

Bea S.

Ok I'll try boots then thank you Alex! Actually I might be able to enquire...hmmmm...

Mar 13, 2015

Jen C.

Take a picture of her with her usual make up on. Find a few " goth" looks and ask her if you could do her makeup to look like the picture. Do a side by side comparison of the two looks and see if she wants advice on how you did her makeup.

Mar 13, 2015

Bea S.

Thank you holly I will. Jen, that is a very very good idea!!

Mar 13, 2015

Anna D.

You should tell her in the kindest way possible. If she didn't tell you about something that others were talking about behind your back, how would you feel...?:)

Mar 13, 2015

Hannah K.

Boots will definitely do it, I know the Clarins and No7 counters do :)

Mar 13, 2015

Emma A.

Bea I don't think boots does this, I would recommend going to Selfridges if you have one near by? But at counters to do your face they do pay and you have to slot in a time. Maybe that's what you can arrange once you have spoken about it?
I think how I would approach it is something like 'in this light the makeup doesn't look quite right, it's showing up really patchy, and your eyeliner looks uneven' don't go full on blazing then maybe have an idea by saying let's got to Mac and have a girly day by getting our makeup done professionally? Or if not that try suggesting what needs to be done and help her fix it and explain why

Mar 14, 2015

Riff W.

I would just tell her and kind of sugarcoat it because I don't like being harsh. Just let her know that caking all of that product on her face makes marks on her face more pronounced and she should invest in either a full coverage foundation or concealer that will do the job with less product. Tell her that doing thicker eyeliner on the bottom gives the illusion of saggy eyes and to make it thicker on top and not too far down on the bottom. Introduce transition colors to her because from the sound of her style, I think she'll like a smoked out eye look. Tell her to line her lips first and then fill them in. Give her advice and don't just not tell her.

Mar 14, 2015

Shaye M.

This is what I would do, I would sit down with her and try to explain that people are mocking her behind her back because of the way she does her makeup. When I was 16 I would have said "whatever, I don't care what they think" however, looking back I should have cared because my brows were freaking terrible, my foundation was all wrong. I wish I would've had a makeup bestie during school so I didn't have to teach myself everything lmao, none of my friends wore makeup so I was on my own. If I had a friend that thought this about me I would've wanted them to tell me so I could fix it, not continue to be mocked. Tell her you don't agree with them talking behind her back but you can see why they're doing it and try to explain what it is and maybe she'll keep working on it. Just remember though, makeup IS a learning process, I'm sure I'm not the only girl that looked ratchet at school because I didn't know any better. Maybe introduce her to this site? So she can learn.

Mar 14, 2015

Landrey S.

I would start with a good skincare regimine and go from there

Mar 14, 2015

Cat L.

I agree with Alex P. But I would call ahead and tell someone the situation that way they can help you out in emphasizing what NOT to do.
And tips on what to do, and if that doesn't work I would just tell her that you love her and support her, but others are laughing at her style and you don't want that happening to her.