“Your hair is SO DIFFERENT!”

Aug 24, 2014

Breeze T.

Hey everybody!
I wanted to start a conversation about how something as basic as hair can get people talking, discussing, or even mocking or avoiding other people, depending on where you live and the attitude of people around you.

I like experimenting with my hair. I've had it shaved, short, long, with designs, grey, blue, purple, pink, multicolored... Right now it's tightly curly, a perm I had done in May (it's all grown out now, but that's another story).

Some of you have done similar things too, and I'm curious to find out what people's reactions are when your hair is “different”.
Q: What are your experiences? Do people treat you differently because of your hair?

A: I live in a small town in northern Italy, and in all honesty I don't know what people are saying behind my back, but the reactions I get are positive, even with elders and families I work for (I teach English to kids and teens privately- they're all pretty rich and conservative people). They seem to like it, is what I'm saying. Are they just saying that to be nice?
Anyway, people do stare, and people love to comment too.

Please, I would love to hear your answers!

Aug 24, 2014

Alyx T.

All the time. I have one side shaved and it's often funky colors. People often assume I'm a brat, that I listen to heavy metal, am slutty, I drink and do drugs and that I'm not a good human being. Pretty much the opposite of me lol. I get watched more carefully in stores (when I go back to the same store with my shaved part covered and it's blonde, there's no suspicious activity from staff, no employees follow me) it's also hard to find a job since people assume that it'll draw the wrong crowd into their store.

Old ladies always love my hair but only until they see the shaved part. Then it's "too manly" for me.

A lot of people love it too though. I get complimented from strangers, every time I go out someone asks me how I did it or asks if it's a wig because it's unusual. But it's only open minded people. That's the only times that people don't assume I'm the scum of the earth. But it's me, I love it and it's my form of art.

Aug 24, 2014

Alyx T.

Oh and it's honestly usually 15-30 year olds that hate it, or 60+. My moms friends all love it, and teachers and such. But teens my age or a little older, or elders mostly hate it. There's some teens that like it, but they almost always assume I'm going to turn them into a drug addict or something.

Aug 24, 2014

Breeze T.

Thanks for your answer, Alyx!
I'm sorry this happens to you, it's a struggle being colorful! Actually, I'm just a bit na?ve and I don't realize when people are stating most of the time, and if they look weirded out, I give them one of the biggest smiles just so they can move on feeling even more confused lol!

Aug 24, 2014

Breeze T.

Lol that drug thing is such a clich?, isn't it? I just have to shrug and laugh when people assume that!

Aug 24, 2014

Rissa G.

Whenever I had SUPER bright red hair, people seemed to love it. I'd always get compliments. I wouldn't doubt that I got mocked, though. I didn't have a problem with my job, but I worked at the mall at the time, at a kiosk. I actually attracted a lot of people, because of my hair. lol. I'd always get questions. People definitely stared and whispered to each other...which I hardly ever noticed because I just don't care who's judging or not anymore. I used to, lol. Now it just annoys me because people will find ANYTHING to talk about and make it their business, so it just annoys me and I'm like "oh get over it, yes I am/have _____ on." Lol.

Aug 24, 2014

Rissa G.

Also, I smile at people as well when they're clearly judging! Oh such a classic move, and their either confused or sour look they get after you do that is hilarious lol.

Aug 24, 2014

Alyx T.

Lol I always just smile too. I have a piercing too, so it's worse. I often get "why would you ruin your pretty self by doing those awful things to your hair/face" I always just smile and say something along the lines of "why not? I think it adds to my beauty, I did it for myself and I did not do this for you or anybody else." It always shuts them up fast lol.

I'm so fine with people being closed minded about it, it's such an easy filter for those that I do and don't want in my life. If they're offended because I (not them not somebody in their life) have a "different" hair cut or color, or I got something pierced, than I don't want to be friends with them. They'd be mean and closed minded, and I want to go ahead and have a nice future, and not into the past and relive what woman had to go through in the 40's.

Aug 24, 2014

Breeze T.

Exactly what I was trying to say, Renay. I just change so often that I don't notice people staring anymore lol. Not sure of good or bad... lol

Anyway, that's what is expected.

Aug 24, 2014

Alyx T.

Oh I know the drug thing pisses me off. Like I don't drink at all(I've had probably 5 drinks in the past 5 years lol), I've never done drugs before, I don't sleep around, I don't party all day or anything and I don't associate myself with that type of crowd anyways, since it's not really my lifestyle it's awkward being an introvert and being friends with huge party animals.

Aug 24, 2014

Kitty K.

@Alyx
LOL!
My dad is a prime example of that... he always talks down about tattoos and funky hair colors. And he does it to EVERYONE.
Too bad most of the people he's talked down to about it... has tattoos and has had funky hair colors. It's such an old fashioned, stereotypical belief. I can't help but giggle... the last person he talked to about it, actually has like 6 tattoos and had dyed her hair all crazy colors when she was young. He was sitting there saying they grow up to be nobodies and I was like.. 'Well I want to dye my hair these crazy colors and get the six tattoos she has, cause she makes a hell lot more money than we do' lmao.

The good thing about today is that the idea of crazy colors seems to be expanding. My BFF actually dyed her hair a series of crazy colors, and right now she's sporting a light, pale pink with rosegold tints to it and my dad didn't have any remarks about it.



As for my hair... oh lord that's a whole other story that includes racism and what not. Apparently I can't be light skinned and have my dominican ethnic curls.. oh well sucks to be those people!

Aug 24, 2014

Buttercup x.

I never had my hair any funky colours, but I live in a very small village, where mainly elderly people live and there's a lot of talking about appearances going on and that includes hair.
I have to say though, that I found that people in the punk or goth scene that would sport crazy hair usually come of as very helpful in a way... Like it's usually those people that get up for elderly people on public transport or help them cross the street, which kind of goes against every stereotype people may have.
This post may be weird, sorry

Aug 24, 2014

Alyx T.

Kitty I know lol. It's so funny though, I've walked last groups of older men and they literally get so offended that they get into these big rants just by me walking past lol. But old ladies almost always love the color. When I'm on public transit buses I always have old ladies touch my hair.

And the ethnicity thing I definitely get that! As a kid I had super long spiral curly hair, and my mom cut it short since I wouldn't let her brush it lol. But she cut it to like a bowl cut and my hair was super straight. as my gets longer it gets curlier. Not quite as intense as yours, but it's so curly and everybody is like "why would you get a perm, you're too white to have that curly of hair" and it's like "... Every skin color can have curly hair. This is natural" it's so dumb how people don't understand that it's not all white people have straight hair and all black people have curly hair. There's mixed races now and I don't understand how people don't get that.

Aug 24, 2014

Kimberley T.

I've had super bright and shaved hair before, and I've noticed that when I have it either purple or dark green I get ALOT of attention from dudes in particular.
I receive heaps of compliments (not even on my hair) and generally people just seem nicer. When I then dye my hair brown/black nobody will approach me/talk to me on the bus and it seems like nobody notices me.
It kinda hurts when I go back to natural colours because the things people would compliment me on (my eyes, tattoo, clothes, hair cut) just never get acknowledged at all.

Aug 24, 2014

Alyx T.

Kimberley I know exactly what you mean. It's such an easy icebreaker so more people come up and talk to you. When it's gone there's no super obvious ice breaker so you don't get to meet as many people.

Aug 24, 2014

Breeze T.

Sorry guys, I'll be back when I wake up, it's 1:30 am here, I need some sleep. Sorry I couldn't read all of it yet, I just lost track 'cause I'm extra sleepy. Be back tomorrow and I'll talk to everyone on here :)

Aug 25, 2014

Sydnee B.

Haha when I had the side of my head shaved I got called a dyke, a man, skrillex etc. I don't get how shaving your hair can receive so many horrible comments or even dying it for that matter.

Aug 25, 2014

Shaye M.

I remember when I had my hair the brightest red ever my grandma just couldn't seem to stop hating on it, I don't know why but she's really ever been the only person that says anything negative about my changing my hair but I think it's because my hair is naturally ginger/strawberry blonde so she never wanted me to dye my hair to begin with. But when I do my hair lavender I do get a lot of compliments from other girls 20+ so I don't know haha! But like Alyx said, it does have it's disadvantages, when I go shopping I always have employees treating me differently and assuming because I look like that, that I'm a thief, degenerate, etc.and it can be the most annoying thing ever.. Trying to shop and all I can think is "wth are you looking at, leave me alone lol"

Aug 25, 2014

Cooper C.

Hey guys! I have a question about having eccentric hairstyles. I've never had anything out of the ordinary but I've always been curious as to why people modify their bodies against societal conventions. Do you know that you'll be treated differently/judged before you change your style? Do you do it purposely just to get a reaction from people? What is the objective in doing this? I don't intend for these questions to be rude, it's my honest curiosity :)

Aug 25, 2014

Kimberley T.

@ Copper
I've dyed my hair weird colours and I've gotten facial piercings (such as my septum) and I have tattoos. I didn't do it with the intention to look different from the crowd or get a reaction, I did it all because I like how I look with it. I don't care if people disagree with how I look because it's MY body and beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

Aug 25, 2014

Shaye M.

@copper;
For me, it was just because I wanted to. I don't think people need to validate their choices to anybody, especially body modification. It's personal preference really, I like piercings, dyed hair and body modifications and I've never cared that I may be "judged" so to speak because like I said, some people like it; others don't. Some people will make rude remarks and some will compliment them. At the end of the day though; I like them and that's what matters. And the objective? There isn't one, I didn't make the choice to get my cheeks pierced because someone else liked them, I got them because I wanted them, not to stand out from anyone else or get a reaction.

Aug 25, 2014

Breeze T.

@Kitty & Alyx
That really is a whole other story. I'm in love with your hair!! People have been commenting on my hair so much since I made it curly, and everyone wants to touch it...and it's not even that extreme :/ I'm not saying that I get what some naturally curly haired girls are going through, but I'm starting to understand.

@Buttercup
I love that they are the nicest ones :) awesome!!

@Kimberley
Aw, yeah that's one downside. Once you go colorful, you can feel invisible with "normal" hair. I know I do.

@Em
I like your take on the subject, your hair is different in terms of thickness. Aren't you glad that Western culture celebrates thick hair? I know I love it!

@Sydnee
These people were really rude, and they're crazy, what's their problem?! You're beautiful and you don't look like a man at all! People get jealous.

@Shaye
I think you look incredibly gorgeous regardless of your hair. But I understand grandma a bit, she loves your ginger hair so much :)

@ Copper
Yes, I know I will be treated differently, I like it as a social experiment too. No, I don't do it purposely to get reactions, but as I said before, I welcome them with a big ole smile. The objective is to make myself happy, and I'm happy when I change.. I just love change.

Another question for you guys and girls: I find it annoying that nobody ever recognizes me when I change my hair. Do you get this? It's the only frustrating thing, because saying hi and explaining why I'm saying hi to them is just embarrassing...

Aug 29, 2014

Jes T.

I have very very thick, frizzy dry course curls that are so hard to take care of. I never really was treated differently for them until I had a mock job interview at school and I wore my hair natural and the teacher told me that "in the real world" my curly hair is "unprofessional" and to get a real job I would have to straighten it. ( which was ironic because I got a job as a marketer at a technology company with curly hair at the interview!!) One boy once told me I would look prettier with straight hair too which made me mad lol. last summer I dyed my hair little mermaid red and straightened it every single day and I didn't get taken as seriously and I got hate from
older relatives and I feel like I was always being judged and people assumed I was a drug addict or something lol.